Pet jokes

What do cat actors say on stage? What is the cat's favourite TV show? What happens when it rains cats and dogs? Catch up on our favourite one-liner pet jokes and make sure you send us your favourites so we can include them here.

What happened when the cat ate a ball of wool?
She had mittens!

What do cat actors say on stage?
Tabby or not tabby!

Why did the poor dog chase his own tail?
He was trying to make both ends meet!

What did the cat say when he lost all his money?
I'm paw!

What is the cat's favourite TV show?
The evening mews!

What happens when it rains cats and dogs?
You can step in a poodle!

How is cat food sold?
Usually purr can!

What's the unluckiest kind of cat to have?
A catastrophe!

What do you get if you cross a cat with a tree?
A cat-a-logue!

If there is H2O on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside?
K9P.

What do you call a cat with eight legs that likes to swim?
An octopuss!

Why did the cat join the Red Cross?
Because she wanted to be a first-aid kit

Why did the snowman call his dog Frost?
Because frost bites !

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